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LynnS Profile
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Articles: Givers & Takers in Relationships


Interesting reading written by Bill McDonald, a counselor. Not specifically about N's but discusses over-givers and the attraction to chaos. Good articles, IMO:

]Giver and Takers, Part 1

]Givers & Takers, Part 2

]Givers & Takers, Part 3

]Givers & Takers, Part 4


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"The best way out is always through."--Robert Frost
Oct/16/2009, 6:03 pm Link to this post  
 
bellvireo Profile
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Re: Articles: Givers & Takers in Relationships


Hi Lynn,

Great site. I loved the way he explained relationships and their outcomes.

I used to be so confused that stbxnh would feel like I was "taking" from him every time he would nice to me. And that he would make me pay for his "having" to be nice to me later.

He didn't realize that it ceased to be something that I received (whether it was a kind word, whatever), when he begrudged me my happiness at his gift. It became a point of pain for me.

Thanks Lynn, I'll check more of Mr. McDonald's web page soon!
Oct/16/2009, 7:07 pm Link to this post  
 
nearing60 Profile
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Re: Articles: Givers & Takers in Relationships


Lynn,

Thank you. I enjoyed the articles and can identify with the "out of balance" feeling
that givers experience. In addition to living with the exHN, I was a caregiver by profession for 30 years, so my burnout was compounded. As the author suggested, I think not feeling good enough was the basis for
extending myself too much. I took a break from working (last year) and a permanent break from the spouse!
Oct/16/2009, 9:12 pm Link to this post  
 
Had Enough9 Profile
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Re: Articles: Givers & Takers in Relationships


bump
Dec/29/2011, 8:32 pm Link to this post  
 




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