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Are you walking on eggshells with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?
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suzyq1234 Profile
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Registered: 11-2008
Posts: 246
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Re: No Contact and N-Dipping


I have not seen or spoke to my xN but he is always on my mind because i am having to deal with my n mother alot lately. I do however know he is on face book and a photography group i belong to. These are often places i am on the net and i do not want to quit facebook or the photo club. There is no way to avoid him. Suggestions appreciated
Feb/21/2011, 4:09 pm Link to this post  
 
LynnS Profile
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Registered: 10-2008
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Re: No Contact and N-Dipping


Bump :flower:

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"The best way out is always through."--Robert Frost
Aug/18/2011, 5:17 am Link to this post  
 
okiegal52 Profile
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Registered: 06-2011
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Re: No Contact and N-Dipping


Oh, how I love this post!

"Kicking and screaming" describes exactly how I would not let go of the need for "closure" for so long, I continued to waste my precious time on sending unanswered emails for several months!

Blessed PEACE when once I stopped! emoticon

Regards to all. :flower:

Ever forward and N-free! emoticon

Okie

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Okie
Aug/19/2011, 12:52 pm Link to this post  
 
Affectionatedragon Profile
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Registered: 11-2008
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Re: No Contact and N-Dipping


A refresher on NC.

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"Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity." Mark Twain
Feb/16/2012, 10:16 am Link to this post  
 
Silvaria Profile
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Registered: 04-2012
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Re: No Contact and N-Dipping


I love the OP, the replies in this thread, and especially this:

quote:

okiegal52
"Kicking and screaming" describes exactly how I would not let go of the need for "closure" for so long, I continued to waste my precious time on sending unanswered emails for several months!



I'm there right now...I've been writing him multiple emails the past week or so, mostly just making conversation. Then I told myself it was going to stop.

Well, I broke NC today and wrote him another unanswered and rather pathetic email asking him to please get in touch with me...I didn't quite beg, but the implication was there, and that's how our relationship has gone for over 3 years: He tells me it's over, we're never speaking again, leave him the hell alone...I cry and beg and plead for him to come back...he shuns me for a while completely, then one day I get a curt message to the effect of, "I've gotten over my anger enough to start talking to you again, b_____", and of course I pounce on it eagerly and spend the next week to month working my way back into his "good" (and I use the term loosely!) graces.

Then things are really great for a while, the promises begin again, I'm being wooed...and I fall for it every time, lol...

But nowI'm starting to see that I haven't been able to go full NC because I'm not doing it for the right reasons.

I'm mostly doing it is a way to get him to miss me, to realize what he has in me, and come back and apologize like he did the VERY first time (but never since, after that it was always him "giving me another chance", and I've endured 6 breakups since that first one).

I still have constant fantasies of a perfect reconciliation, of going back to those original days when he was literally Mr. Perfect and made me feel like a Queen.

But as has been mentioned here a lot, the hardest thing is letting go of that fantasy. After all, I'm different, I'm the one who can make a difference in his life...aren't I?

Part of me still clings to that, but I think the part that is accepting that I'm not, and no one ever will be, is growing regularly...and there must be a "point of no return" coming eventually that tips the scales once and for all towards going NC for the -right- reasons.

Does anyone have a Fast Forward button so I can get there in about 3.6 seconds? :x1mad

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Every day is not a good day, but there is something good in every day.
Apr/10/2012, 10:48 pm Link to this post  
 
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